Sorrowful Nonetheless

Sorrowful Nonetheless
(from The Walkabout Journals)
by Maverick.214

I am sorry for indiscriminate bouts of indecision.
I am sorry for harboring hate within my heart for those who scorned me.
I am sorry for pulling a trigger when it never felt right within my soul, ever.
I am sorry for my ignorance, insecurity, and impeccable peccadilloes throughout a short life.

Four times magnified by a billion lifetimes,
Twenty-four hours divided by a restless heart,
And infinitely to the power of ten;
a sparrow reminded me of the beauty and grace of flight.
I pray for death but it is a premature flight into the unknown.

I am sorry for so much more, nonetheless.
I am sorry for turning into a demon I could not slay.
I am sorry for not trusting my heart, many times.
I am sorry for dishonoring my spirit.

A billion recollections multiplied by four directions,
Seven days creation summarily codified by a spiritual quest,
And the corners of a tired mind folded neatly into a single nightly prayer;
an angel admonished me for the faults of my character.
I prayed for life but it is a guarantee I cannot make into tomorrow.